Death gives life Meaning
I love to go around saying death gives life meaning. I remember when I was young some kid at my elementary school died when I did not know what death was and I decided to make a joke about where he was and no one thought it was funny. It's interesting how I understood humour before death. I never understood what the big deal was back then, so what people died we are all one after all, you know universe, one part. Then later in life I obtained an ego, a self, or something and became frantically afraid of death consciously forcing cognitive dissonance on myself to fit into a religion in order to have eternal life. Then I watched a Transhumanist documentary and went from focusing myself to be religious to wanting to dedicate myself to studying life extending technology. Then I saw how defective human coordination was in practice with my inability to manage it and my ego collapsed, I viewed the solution to my cognitive dissonance as death. Drenched in nihilism I later went down some conspiracy rabbit holes and decided to believe what was more entertaining rather than what was true. Well not exactly, Contradictions do not exist. Whenever you think that you are facing a contradiction, check your premises. You will find that one of them is wrong. Therefore when I wiggle my gestalt understanding of reality with enough contradictions I can sense strings of meaning, narratives, that I and one I can play though. And let me tell you, you can do A LOT of wiggling if you have an open mind, it can be dangerous though.
So what is this Will of Death thing? The Will of Death is the immense force one can wield if they can internalize a certain set of values associated with the realization you are going to die. Your "ego" or sense of "self" is going to disappear anyways so why not wield it like a glove rather than letting it wield you. Here is how internalize this idea, you at some sort of public event and you see someone attractive and want to talk to them, rather than being you and identifying with how you feel in the moment just remember you are manipulating a meat bag and let experience wash over you. This is similar to how you can eat really spicy food then remind yourself that it's just a sensation, it will pass, and the spiciness becomes easier to deal with. Spiciness like cringe builds character. Sometimes inaction means death so summon that native instinct and act, don't die in mediocrity make a dent in the universe.
Alright I am an Envoy with a meat bag to manipulate that doesn't really get me anywhere. I need to find those strings of meaning. Well what exactly is a string of meaning? A string of meaning is a Quest. Ah a Quest, everyone has a quest, just most of us don't articulate it. What are my quests? I got phrases I like to repeat but have I really analysed them? Nope I have not. How do I find my Quest then break it down into actionable insights?